If  you’re around this weekend (Sat 3rd July 2010) in Sydenham SE26, pop along to Wells Park Road to learn all about the £3.5 million that’s about to be spent on a high tech new building!

More information about the Sydenham Youth Centre here.

.

.

.

CLICK HERE TO GO TO SYDENHAM’S GOT TALENT 2010

Penelope
Talent Co-ordinator and Event Promoter for Sydenham’s Got Talent 2010
PART OF SYDENHAM ARTS FESTIVAL 2010

This post has been moved to its proper home:
http://www.sydenhamsgottalent.com/2010/06/15/sydenhams-got-talent-2010-diary-day-1/

Or ‘Alice Goes Walkabout’

I’ve always found that the best way to make friends and connections in a new community is to volunteer to help on local projects, so when I recently moved to Sydenham in South London I got straight onto a bit of research.  It wasn’t long before I discovered the Sydenham Arts Festival just about to launch – a double plus because of my ambitions as a creativity-promoter and love for project-managing creative events.

Alice meets the White Rabbit

Within 24 hours of meeting Jonathan Kaufman, the festival director, I was on my way to my first event: the Alice in Wonderland Tea Party. All I knew was that it was being held in a large garden nearby; beyond that….nothing. At midday I arrived at a tree-studded lawn with a few people milling around doing something unclear but all-absorbing, and I was put to work lugging and sweeping.

The sweeping soon led to a large hole at the base of my thumb (mutter…outdoor vacuum-cleaners…mutter…), so I was thankful to be asked to create a White Rosebush for one of the scenes. Not that I have any talent for that whatsoever.  Joy, Vania and I got cutting and sticking, though, and came up with something surprisingly good out of cardboard and paper.

A fine view of our Hatter Stand

So, anyway, the 3pm start time arrived and the gardens filled up with parents and small children. I was stationed at the ‘Make a Mad Hatter’s Hat’ stall, with all you needed to make a spectacular piece of headgear. This was organised by Joy, who had spent many, many hours preparing all the pieces.  The stall (actually about 8 tables long) was immediately swarmed over by children glueing, stapling and drawing.

My role consisted mostly of pointing at the pens and saying “Look, there are pens”, because I hadn’t worked out how all the pieces went together and I was scared, but I think I may have a new career in pointing.  Joy and the other volunteers worked amazingly hard helping the children produce their pieces of art.

Then the show itself began, and I was fascinated to see the concept come to life. Essentially the whole large garden was the stage, with the four acts set in different locations.

The Tea Party

This meant that the whole audience moved with the production, from tree to stump to table.  All settled, the act would play out, followed by a break in which tea and cakes (because it’s a TEA PARTY!) were eaten and the Hat stall swarmed-over again.

There were just four human actors playing most of the parts, with gusto. The White Rabbit was a large and very ugly puppet played with talent by a young lady who manhandled it around the sets.  The Dormouse was, by the looks of it, an oversized glove puppet – popping up out of the huge teapot and delighting the children gathered around.  My favourite, though, was the miniature Alice when she drank the liquid – so absurd!

The Tea Party

.

.I had never been to an event quite like this, and I was very impressed with the imagination that went into making it work and engaging the audience.  The director of this play was Jonathan Kaufman, who is the main mover of this whole Sydenham Arts Festival.

More pics

The White Rosebush

Alice in Custody

The pack of cards is released!

The Cast

The White Rabbit

Summary: approaching your tasks a little differently can allow you to use your time far more effectively.

The Problem

How do you approach your day?  Do you feel you’re getting the most out of your hours, or are you just moving about all day without really progressing? I get so annoyed with myself when I let that happen – it means I’ve been frittering time on things I dislike, when I could have been spending it on looking at expensive shoes.

So.  Most people make the big, big mistake of just starting something without thought and persisting until it’s finished, before moving on to the next task. Come to that, a lot of people start whole businesses like that, but that’s another article.

This ‘just start’ approach can be ineffective for several reasons:

• there’s no overview of the task, to find the fastest or most productive way of doing it




• people can only maintain focus on an uninteresting task for a short while.  Much of the time spent on the task will actually be spent either daydreaming or remembering something vital to be Googled




• often you may not get to the task at all, because its size is so daunting or you’re experiencing ‘tasker’s block’ (see A few dozen reasons to procrastinate)




• that one task may end up crowding out other equally vital tasks, which need at least a start made on them.

The Method

If you recognise any of those, then it’s time to try something new. Find yourself some kind of alarm timer which is very easy to set. You can get good ones with minutes and seconds for under £10 at big supermarkets (make sure it has big numerals).

1. Decide how many hours you will work before you stop (this also avoids the problem of forgetting to stop – the curse of those who work at home)




2. List all of the things you need to achieve by the end of the day




3. If your work is the kind to have interruptions, add in an Interruptions task of the amount of time you think is lost on it (just to count it in)




4. Don’t forget lunch. Eating and a break of some kind are an important part of your day




5. Assign the amount of time to each task you think it needs or are obliged to give it. If some could be carried out at the same time (e.g. Bank and Shops), consider including them as one.




6. If you have tasks you loathe or which are trivial, try assigning just 15 minutes or less to them (I’ve resorted to 1-minute tasks before to crack my resistance), and approach them as a time-challenge.




7. Count how many hours it adds up to, then adjust the times to fit into the time available. If the total time is absurdly large, consider losing a task or two; else stick with the times you assigned.

From here you can go one of two ways, according to the day and the nature of the task:

• Pick your first task and set the timer for the time you gave it. Think 80/20: what action on the task will produce the greatest results in the time available?

- or -

• Pick your first task and set the timer for a short period (I usually set it for 30 or 15 minutes). What action on the task will produce the greatest results in that time? When time is up, put the task aside and turn to the next. Rotate your task attention, giving a task only as much time as you assigned to it.

It may well not go perfectly – life is rarely so smooth – but don’t abandon it if so: if you manage only a few tasks this way, you will still have made progress.

Even More Advantages

Now, what are the added advantages of doing it this way?

1. It forces you to accept that you have a limited amount of time available to you, and that if you can’t make time expand, you’ll have to make the tasks either shrink or disappear




2. It makes you work so much faster! Although you may be appalled at trying to work on some of your tasks in just 15 minutes, you’ll be amazed at how much you achieve




3. It breaks down a lot of resistance, because the commitment is so short




4. Working in restricted slots like this forces you to put aside a task before it is wholly finished. This gives you fresh eyes when you come back to it, and you’ll probably find your unconscious has been cranking away on it in the meantime, giving you new insights




5. Moving from task to task keeps you feeling fresher throughout the day

The value of this approach will probably become clearest when you stop using it for any reason. I know that when I forget to use it, my whole day goes to pot!

Good luck!  I hope I’ve found you some more time to look at expensive shoes. Or cars. Or chocolate..mmmm, chocolate…

Penelope

Related posts:
A few dozen reasons to procrastinate

Summary: Procrastination is usually about fear, so “pull yourself together” self-talk has no effect. Here’s a practical exercise to convert procrastination into can’t-stop-myself enthusiasm.

If there’s one thing that’ll kill a small business, it’s faffing about. I groan to my ankles, though, when I read articles which say “you should do this, and this, and that to sort yourself out.” Trite as hell: we all know what we should be doing, and if we could only make ourselves do it, we’d be doing it already, thank you.

Sometimes the fear is big enough that we won’t even risk examining it, in case we walk smack into The Danger by mistake. Ah, the joys of being so evolved.

I’m trying a different approach, then: one which sneaks around the back door while you’re having a cup of tea and a nice chat in the sitting room, and does all the washing up for you.

The challenge for you here is to try to stay on the (metaphorical) sofa as long as possible while doing this exercise. Once you learn the ropes, it can become an automatic, routine mental check.

The Exercise
Looking at the case studies (Steve’s Contract, The Writer) after you’ve read this will help you to see how it pans out in practice.

1. Promise yourself that you absolutely WILL NOT make yourself do anything at the end of this exercise. We need your Inner Toddler (No! Won’t!) to be a willing participant, so you’re…just playing…with ideas.

2. Find yourself a pad and pencil, which will allow you to be both coach and client. It really does make a difference: it stops your mind wandering.

3. Write down what objective this task supports. Give yourself a brief mental picture of the outcome (e.g. efficient office, freedom from tax-man, new business opportunities, well-defined goal & strategy).

4. Write down this question on the pad: “What does not-doing [the task] protect me from?”

5. Notice any rumblings of resistance, physical feelings or sudden deep breaths as you consider the question – they’ll help you to locate the answers. For more ideas, take a look at the list in A Few Dozen Reasons To Procrastinate.

6. Write down all the answers without self-censorship. A lot of the answers may be very sensible, but if you’re finding any of them embarrassing, have compassion for your Inner Toddler… Besides, no-one else’s answers are going to be any more mature.

7. Then ask yourself: “What would make it safe to do [the task], even though there is [the issue]?” and write down the answer. Try to stay on-target: if you suddenly realise the answer is to redecorate the office, make a note of that need, but still answer the safety question.

8. Keep asking the ‘safe’ questions to cover all aspects of the situation, all issues (particularly in terms of it not going perfectly well), until you feel you have reached, and made safe, the nub of the problem. The fears and practicalities have been honoured and catered for. You feel relaxed, with no rumblings of resistance.

9. Now discuss with yourself (still writing it all down) what would make it fantastic to do [the task]: really remember the benefits of finishing the task and achieving the objective. See that mental picture again, get right into it, with full feelings attached. This is why it’s worth doing, why it was on your list.

10. I was going to say here “Go to it”, but in fact you’ll probably find you’ve started without even trying!

If you get stuck with this, it may help to get a friend to play ‘coach’. If it really starts to look like a complicated issue, then that’s where the professionals come in – they’re skilled in asking the right questions.

Penelope Else

Related posts:
A few dozen reasons to procrastinate

Procrastination case study: The Writer

Procrastination case study: Steve’s Contract

[For the article Procrastination: How to stay on the sofa as long as you like]

Steven called me, needing to complete the first draft of an important contract, but procrastinating way past the end of his patience. This is how the conversation went (edited for brevity):

Me: What objective is this task supporting?

Steve: Getting us new business, letting us start work.

Me: What does not writing the contract protect you from?

Steve: (after thinking for a moment) I know it sounds odd, but it’s protecting me from success.

Me: Can you expand on that?

Steve: Well… I’m worried that if this contract is accepted, I won’t be able to deliver a quality product to my client.

Me: And what would make it safe to write the contract, even though you are worried that you won’t be able to deliver a quality product to your client?

Steve: Having more support – I don’t have the resources, because my partner is working on another project, and I don’t have time to supervise our new techie.

Me: Do you know what you can do to resolve this issue?

Steve: Yes, we can…[discussion of options]

Me: What would make it safe to write the contract, knowing that you need to resolve certain resource issues?

Steve: I would need to talk to my business partners seriously about the whole resourcing issue and insist that they contribute to the contract drafting – that it isn’t just me, we’re all in on it. [discussion of this issue].

Me: And what would make it fantastic to complete this contract?

Steve: Well, it’s all about building a relationship with this new client – if we get this right, the expansion potential is enormous [describes the opportunities].

Me: How do you feel about writing this contract now?

Steve: Yes, I think I can do it now. I think I can finish the first draft by tonight, and present to to them as a starting point for discussion.

Me: And you’ll email me to let me know?

Steve emailed me that night, saying that the first draft was written, ready for presentation.

A case study based on the exercise in Procrastination: How to stay on the sofa as long as you like

We’re all drawn to different professions according to our natures, and with those natures seem to go particular fears. Writers are a case in point: they tend to be introverted (as in inner-world, not shyness), with a desire to express themselves and a love for quality and craftmanship. Can you guess what makes them procrastinate…?

Coach = Me
Client = Me (and every other writer I know)

Coach: What is the task, and what objective is this task supporting?

Me: Writing an article on “Your product – It’s All About The People”, or something like. The immediate objective is to be able to add it to my blog so that people can benefit from it. The ultimate objective is to make my knowledge and creative skill obvious to potential clients, plus to clarify what I know/think in my own head so that I can exploit it better generally. Okay, so I’m seeing a rather pleasing article with positive comments added by readers, and a sense of clarity in my head about the topic.

Coach: What does not writing the article protect you from?

Me: [Looking at the A Few Dozen Reasons to Procrastinate list]

Mm, “The results may be mediocre” – oh, god yes. If the results aren’t good, then I’m mediocre too. Way to generalise…

“There are more important things to do” – yes, like paperwork before the taxman throws me in jail.

“I may get no reaction at all from the results” – yep, ties into the mediocre thing, plus some vague things about popularity and influence. Invisibility is guaranteed to raise my blood-pressure.

“Giving enemies more things to bash me with” – yes, those invasive pedants are hard work when they start banging on about some peripheral element of my articles. Draining! Demotivating.

I might discover, too, that I have nothing worth saying. That’s sort of there, even though I know it could never be true!

Coach: What would make it safe to write the article, even though it may be mediocre?

Me: Would it be mediocre? Probably not – the early ones were, but I’ve improved hugely, which proves that one has to practise. I’m learning all the time. I’ll just do a random brain dump into a doc, see what shape starts to emerge. I’m a word sculptor, lol!

Coach: What would make it safe to write the article, even though there are more important things to do?

Me: Oh, god, a whole zone of ‘am I writing in order to avoid the paperwork?’ I think the key has to be to allocate time effectively. God knows I know how to do that – if I’m not in avoidance mode. If I allocate time to things properly, I can relax into the ‘Writing the Article’ timeshare without guilting myself.

Coach: What would make it safe to write the article, even though you may get no reaction from the results?

Me: Ugh, ugh and ugh. Okay, breathe. Well, at the very least I’ll have had some writing practice, trying out new styles; plus I’ll have some clarity in my own head. If I get no reaction…then I’ll have to add some things to my task list: self promotion (yuk, a whole new procrastination exercise there) and ‘analysis of how my style compares with those which do get reaction.’

Coach: What would make it safe to write the article, even though it may give enemies something to bash you over the head with?

Me: Eh, the pedants and neg-heads are always out there, looking for a spiritual home. I’m not expecting actual stalkers. I need only to extract from it anything that gives me useful hints on how to improve. Free training!

Coach: What would make it safe to write the article, even though you discover you have nothing to say?

Me: Well, if it’s something I think I should be writing about and I don’t have something to say, that rather suggests some research is in order! That’s okay, no problem there.

Coach: What would make it fantastic to be writing the article?

Me: Having the opportunity to get all the bits and pieces out of my head and onto paper so that I can organise them and know what I think. Reaching the end of it and seeing that it says exactly what I meant it to say, that it’s a work of art, that it’s an effortless read. Being contacted by someone who says ‘We can see you think the way we need someone to think, please do this piece of extraordinarily stimulating work for us’. The feelings? Pleasure at having crafted something of value to me. Additional pleasure that someone else values it too.

Okay, better get brain-dumping! 1 hour for that, 1 hour for paperwork…

Penelope Else

A few dozen reasons to procrastinate

How to remain on the sofa as long as you like

Procrastination case study: Steve’s contract

Summary: A menu of reasons to procrastinate. The first step to getting past resistance is identifying it.

Here’s a nice happy list: all the reasons you might have for avoiding doing the task ahead of you. It probably isn’t exhaustive, but you’ll almost certainly recognise something close to your favourites – and may also see a pattern in those that you choose.

Mine always seem to centre on losing options/independence and producing mediocre results. Nightmare. None of us is free of it, but we can learn our own tendencies and work around them.

So, take look through, pick out the ones that chime (I actually hear a faint ‘ding-ding’ in my ears when I get close). Taking a sudden deeper breath is also often a sign that something is significant, even if you don’t know why yet: the brain getting ready to think.

When you have your collection of reasons, they’ll either melt away in the light, or you can work through the exercise in How to stay on your sofa as long as you like.

Here goes:

I’m not quite sure what the task is:

• I have a dozen different tasks, don’t know which to focus on first
• I’m not sure how this task contributes to my larger goals/objectives
• I don’t know what needs to be done, I don’t know where to start
• I don’t know what ‘finished’ looks like for this task
• It’s just too big a prospect, I’m overwhelmed

I may fail in this task:

• It can’t be done, by anyone
• The results might be ordinary, mediocre, not as good as I want
• I don’t have the skills needed
• I may start it and get stuck
• Everything I’ve touched lately has failed, I can’t take another failure
• I don’t have the tools, space, mental clarity, resources needed
• It may take more time, energy or money than I have

I’m not convinced I should be doing it:

• I don’t deserve it, who do I think I am?
• There are more important, urgent things to do
• I think this task is beneath me, too menial
• This just isn’t what I want to be doing in life, it isn’t me, somehow
• I’m having trouble caring about this or anything
• It conflicts with some of my core values
• I can’t cope with what success would bring next
• This task doesn’t relate to any goal of mine – it’s external

I may face rejection, betrayal, conflict:

• I’m scared of people’s reactions, if I try, if I succeed, if I fail
• It might give enemies more things to bash me with
• People may find out I’m a fraud, mediocre
• I don’t have any support in this, no-one cares
• It will mean having to persuade people of my value
• It means working with people I mistrust, despise or fear
• I may get no reaction at all from the results, be utterly ignored
• I may lose my power or influence in some way
• I may prove to be in the wrong

I may become insecure:

• It might make things worse if I even try it
• If I mess up, it could damage me and my loved ones
• I’m in quicksand – I just daren’t move at all
• I can’t cope with the amount of change it requires

I may become trapped:

• If I say yes to this, it’s no to all other choices
• It might be the wrong choice
• I’ll be bored
• I’ll be stuck in it
• I’ll lose my independence, have to follow others’ rules

[This article was moved here from elsewhere. You can see original comments here]

Related posts:
Procrastination: How to stay on the sofa as long as you like

Procrastination case study: The Writer

Procrastination case study: Steve’s Contract

Summary: Learn to control your breathing in stressful situations. Low breathing helps create credibility, and protects your ability to think.

The Problem
When you’re angry, do people say “don’t get all hysterical” – or do they stop, look at you and think again? When you attempt to command, do people stop what they’re doing and listen to you, or is it as though you’re not there?

It’s frustrating as hell to be ignored or belittled, especially if you’re feeling strongly about something. It happens to pretty well everyone from time to time, but for some people it seems to be the norm.

There may be a reason – and a solution.

When people instinctively obey the police or the military, it isn’t just the uniform (or the guns!). Take a look at them on the news, or out in the street: there’s something very solid about them. You might start to notice the other people who have that same air, that groundedness, that stillness.

Imagine you are in a sales situation, trying to be taken seriously. How would it be to have a bit of that gravitas?

The Exercise
Okay – here’s how you start to get it. Do this exercise, right now – it’s very quick! It’s a little easier standing, but sitting straight is fine.

1. Put one hand below your belly-button, and the other hand on your (opposite) shoulder.

2. Breathe normally, and notice which hand is moving.

3. Now – think of someone or something that you really love, and breathe. Which hand is moving?

4. Finally – think of someone or something that REALLY winds you up. Breathe. Which hand is moving? (Go back to your happy place now!)

The Meaning
Why is this interesting? Because this little exercise is showing how stress affects your breathing. I’m prepared to bet that when you thought of something you love, the lower hand was moving, and when you thought of something that winds you up, the upper hand was moving.

If the hand on your shoulder is moving, you’re only using the top part of your lungs (‘high-breathing’), hindering the oxygen exchange, reducing the oxygen supply to your brain, and increasing the adrenaline. ‘Low-breathing’, when the hand on your belly moves, is using all of your lungs – supplying far more oxygen to your brain and reducing the adrenaline.

You might guess that your style of breathing can strongly affect your ability to think. What may not be so obvious is that it also has a profound effect on your voice and body language – and everyone around you will be unconsciously responding to these, for better or worse.

You’ve probably experienced this plenty of times, when you go to speak to that attractive person, or the bank manager – and instead of smooth, confident tones, you emit a raspy squeak. Humiliating! That’s high-breathing for you.

The same applies when you’re angry: a high-breathing command sounds panicky and out of control. Your upper chest and shoulders are moving in a top-heavy way, and everyone sees it, even if they aren’t conscious of it.

A low-breathing command sounds, well…commanding, because it comes with the full force of your lungs and you’ll be still and centred. People see that too: think military. I’ve made teenagers run away using this. Which was fun.

A Few Examples
One time, I was in a sales meeting with someone who was being difficult, and who was starting to get offensive. When I stated one of our requirements, he sneered, saying “Well, that just seems a rather petty request!” I was getting annoyed anyway, and this was past my tolerance. I could feel my temper rising, but remembered to breathe, low, through my nose. Instead of retorting in some undignified way, I found myself just looking at him calmly, idly wondering why he would say such a thing. This unsettled him completely, and he suddenly apologised, saying he was out of order, and completely caved in to all our requests.

Another time, in a business shake-up, I was feeling somewhat powerless, and knew that if I let on to this, then there would be no compromises made – my partner would just push his own agenda. If I wasn’t careful, my squeaky voice and rising shoulders would give it all away, so I forced myself to breathe low, speak slowly and stay very still while the discussions took place. Although he had come in all ready to win the argument, I could see him quickly become puzzled by my ease and detachment, and the discussion soon took an entirely different line to the one we’d both expected.

Those teenagers: a group of silly ones were messing around in the tube station, making it difficult for passers by. They’d already annoyed the people in front of me, so I took a deep breath, slowed my heart and bellowed “You kids, move!” To my slight surprise, instead of stabbing me and dancing on my head, one said “I think she’s the police – run!”, and they all took off….

The Tips
When you breathe low, stay motionless and talk slowly, you will think far more clearly, appear far more decisive and authoritative, and people are more likely to take account of what you say.

Getting into a habit of putting one hand discreetly on or near your belly at stressful moments will help you to notice what you’re doing, to start training yourself (and yes, you can do it without looking pervy).

Particularly useful when you’re public speaking, in an crisis….or just communicating with your kids! Try it at your next sales meeting.